It was a sunny Sunday, the kind of day Lisa would die for, as she was always intrigued by the fact that, even if they have the sun in their spelling, Sundays are not always sun days...Michael was laying on the porch of the house, a book in his hand and a cup of coffee on the table...The orchard in front of his eyes, the small garden of red roses and the sumptuous villa of the Johnson’s in the back. It was really early in the morning and the chill of the night could still be felt through the yellowish leaves of the apple-treas.
After another sip of coffee, the man got off the chair and took the only pathway through the apple-tree orchard. He lit a cigarette and slowly moved through the trees enjoying the mild light of the sun and the smell of the autumn. He felt that he was living again a hanging drop of melancholy and silence, he was aware that it will soon end and he’ll get back to the big city life, he knew that like every time he arrived in this state of spirit, the hunting memory of Lisa will make room in his mind. But this time he decided to just let it run through his thoughts and memories without hinder it, because he was too tired to stop it and because, even if he would not admit that to himself, he missed her. He missed the time when all the memories seemed to be living inside him, the time he suffered, and his soul was screaming inside. Now it was all gone...Lisa was gone and not even the memory of her was as strong as to make him feel something. It was like he was looking in a mirror and seeing there the expression of his face, without realizing it was him, maybe even wondering whose face was that...
Yet, he missed her, he missed the way her memory used to make him feel and above all he missed himself and the way he used to feel when he was with her. Those were thoughts Michael would never let run his mind...But that day was different...Years ago that very day, he saw Lisa for the last time...Her big blue eyes and her long curly hair, her intrigued look and her silly childish smile every time she was saying something evil. Her way of sleeping with the head on his right arm, her silent breath, her laughter in the morning, her unrealistic ideas about life and love, the mystery around her entire being. Michael remembered all that like it was yesterday when he last saw her, when he last said goodbye and kissed her. He could not forget Lisa’s crying eyes when he told her he believes that they take their common need of magic and love as true love which was not the case that he does not think they are in love, that he is certainly not in love with her. She did not cried, she made huge efforts to even give him a sad smile when getting on the train. What did she feel? Did she really love him? How is her life now? Where is she? Does she have a family and kids? Is she sometimes thinking of him? Just questions without any answer that were bursting into Michael’s mind while wondering through the silent orchard…What a day, this day!
Jane and the children were stil sleeping. The day before had been a really full and busy day for them. They all played all kinds of games in the garden, and then they went into the woods and pretended they are thieves like Robin Hood. They had some really good time together. After that Lisa, the little one, injured her leg while racing Jack on the way back home. Then Jane got upset because he was always on Lisa’s side, treating Jack harshly and ignoring that he was still a child, his child...How could he explain Jane that every time he saw little Lisa he would think of the other woman? How could he explain that the reason why he chose that name was exactly because he needed a refuge from all the regrets? And how could he tell her that the love for Lisa, now changed into parental feelings, was still living in the love for the little girl? How could he explain the fact that after years of marriage, he hasn’t been able to forget? Michael hated himself for still having those thoughts and those feelings on that very morning, while wondering in the orchard of his villa. He hated himself for letting her leave without doing anything, just because he thought back then that every story is the same no matter the persons involved. He mistook love for a relation and was now in a relation that he had mistaken for love years ago. If only he could have lived in this ignorance until the end! But it was not the case. Even if he had not seen Lisa since the day they said goodbye in front of the subway station at the University, her memory and the thought of her was always there, in different shapes, but always there. Despite the fact that he did not manage to find her a few years ago when he decided he could not live his entire life with this regret, he knew now that she will remain there forever, but he also knew that this will never be a happy memory. Still, Michael was aware that it stopped being a painful one. It simply became part of him, part of his mind, and part of his life. Lisa was he...
Little did Michael know that the very day they said goodbye at the University Lisa took the plane for Paris, where she was supposed to visit her aunt Sophie. The plane crashed at the landing and the only two survivors where a dog belonging to a stewardess and a little boy named Michael.
